Monday, 13 November 2017



Goat, Horns, Animal, Farm, Billy Goat


When you finally chew fried goat meat in Narok, you will begin to understand why I always say we should respect goats - whether dead or alive. The fried goat meat should ideally be chased down the throat with 'ugali' cooked by a respectable African woman, instead of defiling it (goat meat) with rice, chapati, potatoes, githeri (just imagine!) and any other nonsense of a similar kind.

It will most likely be at 8:00 pm and you are tired and hungry after making a long journey through several towns. You would most likely have traveled through Eldoret, Kapsabet, Nandi hills, Kericho and Bomet, before you finally found yourself in Narok. You will finally know that you are in Narok, when you begin to see several heards of cows and a number of wheat farms. You will have left most of the maize farms back in Bomet and tea plantations further back in Kericho.

Since you are tired and hungry, you will not care much about the nearby Narok Museum. You will not give a hoot about the several Maasai Morans roaming about town, because we know very well that they are most likely to be business minded guys from Nyeri and Murang'a, disguised as Morans. The real Morans are likely to be deep within the rural parts of Narok.

So, what will you really care about? The answer is food and I  repeat, food. You will therefore follow my foot steps and check into one of the hotels. The best hotels are likely to be the ones which also offer accommodation and have in house butcheries. Those ones will usually take the food department seriously. They are likely to serve you tender and delicious goat meat. You do not want to check into an hotel where they serve you tough meat, which you will chew for several hours, while wondering whether you have been served the scaly foot of some crocodile from Mara river.

I found myself there, with a group of colleagues several months ago. It was as a result of hard work on our side. We had taught some teachable students and their performance had surpassed our expectations. We were therefore rewarded with a trip to Maasai Mara, but this story is not about wild animals. No. My attention in Narok was arrested by goat meat. I had been accompanied by around four friends, whose names I will not mention because first, they deserve privacy and secondly, they were men and there is nothing worth mentioning about men.

What is worth mentioning though, is that on the same table was a beautiful, innocent looking and hardworking girl from Narok University or is it University of Narok? Anyway, I hope guys from Narok University do not give a hoot about what you call them, as opposed to the guys in Nairobi, who raise ,hell every time you refer to them as Nairobi University. They always insist that you call them 'The University of Nairobi'

Okey guys, forget about the girl from Narok University and bring your brains back to the table. Allow me to announce that the fried goat meat and 'ugali' finally landed on our table. The meal was served by a respectable woman and I also tend to believe that they (ugali and goat meat) must have been cooked by a respectable woman, because they blended so well that I even forgot the name of the hotel.

Yes! I forgot the name of the hotel, but can you blame me? It is usually said that a human being has five common senses, but when you taste fried goat meat in Narok, you seem to develop a sixth sense. You feel like you have an extra nose and an extra set of ears. You even find yourself opening your third eye. Your salivary glands start working overtime as they produce a flood of saliva to enhance the taste of meat as well as smoothing the throat to ensure a safe journey for the chewed pieces of meat. You even find yourself involuntarily observing table manners by not talking with food in your mouth. Narok goat meat demands maximum silence and concentration, in order to experience the taste of the goat meat as it is crushed gently between you teeth.

All you need to do after inflicting maximum damage on the goat meat is to wash it down with blended fruit juice, made up of several types of fruits and sweetened with a little sugar and your life will never be the same again.


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